Amy Scott's Thoughts

Sharing the thoughts that bounce around in my brain!

Father’s Day June 19, 2012

Filed under: Family Time,Recollections — Amy Scott @ 6:18 pm

I’m very blessed to have two great Dads in my life. Jeremy’s father, Bill, is a sweet man who is really good at strategy games and math. Anytime I need help adding points at a game, I’m pretty sure Bill is better than a calculator! Since Bill works at the church, I get to see him in action daily. He is always calm and steady. He works hard. He gets to the church before my alarm even goes off! He is dedicated to his work and to his family. I am so thankful for the influence he had is raising his son. I can see how God used Bill to shape Jeremy into the man that he is. I am thankful to have him as a father-in-law.

Father’s Day 2012

Even though my dad and I have some differences, I’m often concerned at just how similar we are. My mom often laughs when I’m talking to her and says things like “Your dad said the same thing” or “Your dad is the same way”. I’ve learned over time that my dad and I really do have some strange similarities. Occasionally, I wonder what God was thinking by making me so much like my father, but for the most part, I guess I should thank him. My dad is a pretty great guy. I guess that is an up side to being like him. Following in his footsteps probably isn’t a bad thing. My dad has always been someone I can talk to about the hard issues in life. I appreciate the honesty and openness I feel in our relationship. My dad has always worked hard to support our family. I will admit to being a bit spoiled growing before my dad discovered Financial Peace University. It was fun to be a daddy’s girl and get new stuff from my dad. Thanks, Dad, for all the clothes and Cabbage Patch dolls you purchased for me over the years, as well as the CDs and the concerts you took April and I (and our friends) to. The stuff really doesn’t matter, but I know that my dad cares about me.

The Softball Years

I’m often sorry that I wasn’t the sport star that my dad had hoped for. My family was big into the softball scene and my dad coached a lot of my teams. I certainly wasn’t the star player, it was great to have my dad around.  He treated me just like all the other kids because that is the way that my dad is – completely fair and very professional (even when it comes to Little League).  However, he could have chosen not to be there. He could have prioritized other things. So thankfully,even though the whole sports thing didn’t pan out for the Vitzthum girls, my dad was still there for us, regardless of how great we were.

Very few girls can probably say this, but one of my favorite things to do in high school was to get into the hot tub with my dad and discuss life. I remember talking with him about becoming president of the school Christian club or what college major I should get. My dad gave me the opportunity to travel to all my top colleges so I could make an informed decision. Being informed is very important to us. We’re natural researchers. My dad drove to the airport with me to get Jeremy in an ice storm. He let me stay up late and The Father of the Bride with him as a kid. I remember the bubbles at the beginning of the movie made me think it was a grown up movie because that was alcohol. I felt like I was getting away with something even though he let me watch the movie right by him! I also remember trying to tell my dad not to drink a soda on the way to a family vacation at the Oregon Coast, because that was “drinking and driving”. I didn’t realize that soda didn’t count!

I could post endless stories and memories about my dad and how much he means to me. I am thankful for the legacy he has given my sister and myself. We were always challenged to love the Lord and serve him first.  We were shown dedication and a hard work ethic. We were given experiences that shaped us into who we are today. So thank you, Dad! I wouldn’t be who I am without! I appreciate all you’ve poured into me. I’m proud to be your daughter! I love you!

 

Relocating June 12, 2012

Filed under: Family Time,Women in Ministry — Amy Scott @ 10:07 pm

The Before!

Today was one of those days where I can say I worked hard! I mean really hard! In fact, I’m really not sure why I’m typing right now and not sleeping. Busy day! Very full of activity. I guess I need to explain a little bit.

With Pastor Vicki leaving at the end of May, I have taken over our Christian Education responsibilities at Bethel Church. It’s pretty much all about curriculum – which I love! I get to be in the decisions on what curriculum we provide at Bethel as well as keep track of current curriculum selection. With our new Growth Groups format, we’ll be resourcing a lot of group leaders with curriculum. Part of the fun will be finding something that works for them and keeping track of who has what.

In the process of Vicki leaving, our staff has started a game of musical offices. Jeremy’s mom, Debbie, moved into Vicki’s office, which meant that her office across the hall from Jeremy and I’s office was empty. The decision was made that this office would be a great option to house our all curriculum in one secure location. Since I’m the closest now to the curriculum at Bethel Church, I have moved into the office with the curriculum.

This morning the office started off as a peachy tan with nothing in it other than random items leftover from Debbie’s move. This morning we painted it a blueish-gray, let the paint dry over lunch, then we moved all the curriculum in and got it into place. I also moved my items from Jeremy’s office over into my new workspace. Seven hours of work have never been so full or so busy! I really couldn’t have done it without the help of my family. My mom came in (on her birthday, she’s so sweet) to help us tape. My sister was there pretty much the whole day – taping, painting, putting up shelves, organizing curriculum! Her husband, Andrew, came in for a while and helped get things put on the shelves as well. Jeremy helped with painting and getting me set up, but the extra hands from my family meant I didn’t have to dominate his whole work day with my move, so it all worked out well! Thanks to my wonderful family for making this day super productive! I got done double what I thought I would!

The After!

I think this new role will be an exciting, new challenge and I’m very excited and blessed by this new work space. However, I will admit that I’m a little sad to be moving out of Jeremy’s office. He has graciously shared his space with me. I know very few couples could work as closely has Jeremy and I have. I’m really going to miss him (even though he’ll be right across the hall). I’m so used to him sitting just a few feet away from me. I’m used to him making me laugh and listening to my thoughts as I think them. Now I’ll have to call him, text message him, shoot him an email or walk across the hall to share my thoughts. It’s going to be a strange change. It seems weird to feel a sense of loss, but we really have a great working relationship and I will miss being his office buddy.

I’m not 100% there yet, but I’m looking forward to getting settled into this new work space. I know that Jeremy isn’t too far away, so I’m sure the transition will be just fine. It’s all a little new to me in this moment and it can feel overwhelming, but I’m praying for God’s favor over these changes. I’m also praying for his peace as I step forward into new territory!

 

Happy Birthday, Nephew! May 28, 2012

Filed under: Family Time — Amy Scott @ 9:17 pm

Today is my wonderful nephew’s 2nd birthday! I couldn’t go without a blog shout out to my favorite nephew, Carson! Right now he is my one and only nephew so it makes it pretty easy to shower all my auntie attention on him. He will be a big brother in July and I’m excited to know if I’ll be have another nephew or maybe a niece this time!

This Saturday, we all assembled at the Point Defiance Zoo in Tacoma, WA to celebrate the glorious birthday! It was perfect weather – not too hot and beautifully sunny! It was a joy to watch Carson’s reaction to each animal! I also got to share a few moments one on one with my little nephew. I treasure these times to snuggle or hold his little hand. So sweet!

After the zoo, we went to a picnic area in the park to have cupcakes and watch Carson open presents! It was so much fun to watch his face as he opened his gifts. He was very excited and played with each one.  Another highlight was listening to him chatter on! I will admit that I don’t understand much of what he says, but I’m so excited for the day where I can understand all his stories! From what I can tell he has a lot of them to share!

Celebrating Carson’s birthday was the highlight of my Memorial Day weekend. I’m so blessed by his addition to our family! I love being an aunt! Every time we get to hang out is special. Family is very important to me, so I look forward to celebrating many more birthdays with Carson as well as future nieces and nephews!

PS – A close second highlight of the weekend, was my brother-in-law arrived today from Kansas! It’s official! My family is all back in the Northwest! This was a very happy weekend to celebrate family!

 

The Bad Blog Follow-Up May 19, 2012

Filed under: Family Time,Simply Me — Amy Scott @ 9:21 pm

It’s a just like a sister to help me add to my blog about what I’m bad at! April let me know that she thought I should have hills added to my list. It’s true. I don’t like hills. As you can guess, that means I’m not much of a hiker. Unless you consider hiking to be walking on a flat surface. In fact, I used my hatred of hills as a part of my college decision process. After visiting Seattle Pacific University and staying in a dorm room at the top of the hill, I decided I just couldn’t do a hill daily. However, funny thing, while Multnomah had no hills on campus, we did have to walk up a small hill and a couple flights of stairs to get to chapel. Since it was a good Christian college, we had chapel almost everyday. So much for avoiding hills. At least, I only have to go there once a day verses up and down multiple times a day. I’ve also been asked why I decided not to climb Mt. St. Helen’s with my hubby, but I think the answer should be obvious! It’s a giant hill!

Now the another thing I thought of after the fact was video games! April spent the night last night while my hubby was away at a men’s conference. It’s nice to have someone else around the house so I don’t have to be home alone all night long. I know I have a dog, but at 13 pounds, he isn’t too intimidating to potential intruders! Anyway, April and I played some Wii Party and it came to me. I’m really bad at video games. We tried our hand at Super Mario Bros a couple weeks ago and we struggled at the first castle. Apparently lava is deadly. Go figure! So yes, video games. I’m very bad at them!

Just thought you should know!

 

 

Mother’s Day May 16, 2012

Filed under: Family Time,Simply Me — Amy Scott @ 1:19 pm

So far, I’ve been writing about my own Mother’s Day experience with preaching. However, since I am not a mother, I want to emphasize the point that Mother’s Day is not about me. I want to take few moments to thank some ladies in my life who mean a lot to me. They are the reason this day is special!

First off, I think it goes without saying that I have an awesome mom. She’s seriously the best! She’s not like most moms and I appreciate that. She didn’t pretend to have all the answers, she didn’t raise me to be a girly girl, she always had my back and made sure I was safe. I might not have a traditional mother, but her wisdom and encouragement over the years have shaped me into who I am today. I can look back on my childhood and know that my mom made Jesus a priority in our home. The faith that parent’s lived in front of me was a foundation for my lifetime relationship with the Lord. I’m thankful for the honest conversations I am able to have with her and for her prayer support in my life. My mom is seriously one of the biggest blessings in my life!

I am blessed to have a mother-in-law that loves deeply loves her family. I can see that in how she has raised her boys to be the men that they are today. I am so thankful for Jeremy’s parents and how they have influenced him. I can say that they did a good job! Since my mother-in-law had all boys, it’s been fun to watch to her have daughters now that all her boys are married. I appreciate all the prayers and support she lends to our family. I get the  joy of having monthly lunch dates with my mother-in-law and I know from these times that she cares about what is going in my life and has a genuine interest in the things I care about. I am blessed to be a part of her family!

I have ladies in my life who I would consider mentors. They are women I can talk about life with. I know that I can trust them and that they love me simply as I am. Jeannie Collins has been a constant source of strength and encouragement in life for over a decade! She’s been with me through a lot of life’s ups and downs. She’s shared many tears, smiles, hugs, and mornings of red cup day with me! Jeannie has always been there to cheer me on and her voice in my life has made a world of difference! Vicki Judd has encouraged me to step up in ministry. She is an advocate for women in ministry and has been a firm supporter in me following after the big dreams God has place in my life. Getting to share the stage with her on Mother’s Day was a big deal for me. It’s a memory that I won’t forget. Our theme was In Her Steps and let me say, Vicki’s shoes will be hard to fill as leaves Bethel Church at the end of this month.

I’m thankful for the many ladies that God has placed in my life. Each is unique blessing! Honestly, I could write endlessly about the love I’ve been shown from the women mentioned above and many others who are not listed. There are so many great women who have poured into me and helped shape me into the woman I am today. I’m thankful for their influence, prayers, encouragement and support. I can’t say thank you enough!

 

Shop Till You Drop May 12, 2012

Filed under: Family Time — Amy Scott @ 12:19 pm

I really should be prepping for my first preaching experience ever… which happens tonight… t-minus 6.5 hours… But I always get the itch to write a blog when I haven’t posted the day before. Even in the busyness of life, writing my thoughts down here seems to help me keep some form of sanity. I thought I would share with you the fun I had yesterday!

It’s been such a blessing to have my sister back in the area! Over the last year I have had to go shopping by myself or with the husband. Both scenarios aren’t ideal! Shopping by myself means standing in front of the mirror for way too long and wondering from every angle if I look okay. I just can’t seem to decide on my own if I like certain things. I will admit that I can be decisive in some clothing decisions, but for the most part a good deal of thought goes into every item before it’s purchased. When I’m by myself it just takes longer to make a decision. Shopping with Jeremy is often like shopping by myself… He just drops me off at a store and finds something manly to do while I’m in there. Even if I do try something on and ask for his opinion, he usually tells me I look good. Don’t get me wrong, this is very sweet, because I honestly do believe he thinks I look good. His lack of any other opinion makes me wonder if it’s really true.

Time to Shop!

My sister and my mom have been my shopping buddies from sometime. They are very helpful. They offer up suggestions, help me decide between which items to get keep and which items should go back. April especially likes to help me see options beyond my usual styles and colors. I can’t help it that I love the colors navy and gray so much! Having a shopping buddy really does help me!

Yesterday was our first shopping trip since April’s been home. I know I’ve said this before, but I do most of my shopping for two seasons in one trip. I’ll have a fall/winter trip and a spring/summer trip. As much as I love getting new things, the process of shopping seems to wear me out. I’m not sure why. I don’t think it’s all the walking around. My guess would be it’s all psychological. As a classic over-thinker, I can make the most fun tasks complicated and tiring. I think this is my problem with shopping.

It was great to be together as a family again. Mom drove which April and I always appreciate! We went down to Portland which is our favorite shopping place. Gotta love no sales tax! We had a wonderful lunch at Claim Jumpers and a yummy afternoon treat of frozen yogurt at Menchies. Overall it was a very successful, fun day! The weather is perfect for my new spring clothes and I’m glad that I have something new to wear while preaching this weekend! Silly, I know, but the honest truth!

 

Family Bonding May 2, 2012

Filed under: Family Time — Amy Scott @ 4:58 pm

As I mentioned before, I spent the weekend at the Oregon Coast with my family. It’s been a busy week with a lot going on at work, but I wanted to blog about my family bonding experience before the details got fuzzy and left my head. I know I shared that we had good times together spiritually as a family, but I would like to focus on another form of family bonding. The silly kind!

There are lots of ways to bring a family closer together and I do believe a spoons tournament did it for our group. For those that don’t know, spoons is a card game kind of like musical chairs. The first person to get three cards of the same kind grabs a spoon. There is always one less spoon than players. Once the three of kind is achieved and the first spoon is grabbed, all the players dive at the spoons and hope to get one. The person who doesn’t get a spoon is out and you remove a spoon for the next round. This game can get a little violent and is very active. It was so funny to attack together over spoons just after we all prayed together! As predicted, blood was drawn. Poor Aunt Patty was attacked by a spoon. My sister-in-law, Beckie, was literally jumped on by Aunt Cathy! Good times! Ultimately there could only be one victor and Beckie took home the prize!

Hoping for a bingo!

We all experienced something new together – Bingo at the Lions Club. I’ve only played Bingo the old fashion way and let me tell you, there are a lot of rules I didn’t know about! Very few won anything from our group, but the attempt at Bingo was pretty fun! I got a pretty purple dobber out of the deal, so I guess I did win in a way. All I can think of now is what kid’s crafts I can do with it! I really should have given it to my mother-in-law, Debbie, since purple is her color! Sorry, Deb! I should have left it for you. However, it didn’t help me win the game, so I’m thinking it was a dud. Or maybe it was my bingo sheets… or maybe it was me… I’m not sure! It was still a lot of fun to all play together and learn something new.

Saturday night as I was getting ready for bed, I realized that a prank had been pulled on me… My bed was short-sheeted. I really should have paid attention to how it was done, since I’ve never short sheeted anyone before. I couldn’t get into bed. *Insert frown here* I initially thought I was the only victim and I resolved myself to say nothing of the matter so it wouldn’t get the reaction my pranking  family had hoped for. However, my other roomies were short sheeted as well, so we made a plan to head down stairs with our pillows to attack. Let just say  heading down the stairs in the pitch black resulted in my missing the last step and almost dying of laughter. Mind you, I was trying to be quiet. We couldn’t find the door handle and I’m afraid our entrance was not smooth. However, the pillow fight that did follow after we made our way into the room was quite funny! Yet another example of family bonding through violence!  Oh my!

Other highlights from the weekend would be getting ice cream at the Tillamook Cheese Factory, exploring the town of Rockaway Beach, and making picture frames to hold our group photo. The serious stuff is good and draws us together, but so does laughter and a good attack now and then! It was all in good fun and tucked away in the memories of Family Ladies Retreat 2012!

 

Another Weekend Away April 29, 2012

Filed under: Bible,Family Time,Travels — Amy Scott @ 6:51 pm

I’ve returned from another weekend away at the Oregon Coast. This time I got to hang out with my family for the weekend. The Scott/Reid/Carroll/Smith crew spent time together laughing, crying, praying, playing, crafting, walking, shopping, and eating together. This year my sis-in-law, Beckie, and my cousin-in-law, Cori, and I took over the planning. I offered to do the devotional time. It was an honor to pray for each of the ladies on our trip and share with them what I felt God laying on my heart. I thought I would share with you our devotional message from Friday evening:

Read Deuteronomy 6

God Moments and Spiritual Storytelling:

This is one of my favorite passages in the Old Testament. It calls us to be story tellers and remember what God has done for us. It’s not just enough to remember in our own quiet moments, but it calls us to be vocal and to share what the Lord has done in our lives.  We can’t keep it to keep it to ourselves. I don’t know about you, but sometimes I get so focused on the future that I forget about the past. Now, I wasn’t there when the Red Sea parted and God delivered the Israelites from Egypt (shocker, right?), but I do have my own God Moments where God showed up big in my life. For me these were moments where God re-directed my life or revealed some life-changing truth to my heart. He has helped me conquer hurdles and obstacles. For me, these God Moments are the times when the Red Sea was parted and God showed up in a big way. When these God Moments are happening, it’s easy to see his hand and recognize his work. However, as time distances us from these moments, the details get hazy. Something we couldn’t stop talking about doesn’t come up as often. We move on and get back to life. This was a big problem for the Israelites. They seemed to have the attention span of a child. God provided miracle after miracle and yet they still didn’t trust him. Even with witnessing the awesome hand of the Lord fight for them, they were still derailed by each new struggle.

This is where Spiritual Storytelling comes into play. Since I work with kids, storytelling is a key part of helping them grasp the Word of God. It’s no different really when we grow up and become adults. We still need to have the element of storytelling. We need to be sharing with each other and the coming generations where God showed up in a big way. Here a couple reasons why Spiritual Storytelling is so important:

  • It helps us remember – when we share our stories; it solidifies the lessons learned in our hearts and minds. It keeps the miracle fresh and live.
  • It inspires us and others – I love that feeling of being on the edge of our seat as you listen to a good story. It’s compelling. When we share our stories, we inspire others in the middle of their own struggles. We are living examples that the Lord is good. Also, our stories will help us in the future. All of us will have many God Moments and have many Red Seas. When we remember how he has been faithful before, we can confidently walk into the next struggle knowing he will not let us go there alone.
  • It keeps the legacy alive – There are moments in history that certainly define a family tree. I can think of couples who have broken the cycle of addiction or abuse, people who have made commitments to change the future for the next generation. These are moments that need to be shared. Even in my own life, I can see how my parents made intentional decisions and shared the reasoning with my sister and me. We are a part of their legacy. These major decisions and life altering moments can change a family tree forever. We must celebrate these changes and also guard the next generation from going back to destructive patterns.

I realize that not every environment is safe for sharing our personal stories. Some things will be shared with only a few. However, I think there is value in sharing our stories even if it is with just a few trusted people. You might feel that everyone already knows your story, but you’d be surprised how many actually don’t.  Also storytelling isn’t a onetime thing. It’s repeating the miracles over and over. It’s about writing them down and making alters of remembrance in our lives. Don’t assume that everyone knows or that no one cares. We all miss out when you keep your stories to yourself!

 

Flying By April 26, 2012

Filed under: Children's Ministry,Family Time,Women in Ministry — Amy Scott @ 2:06 pm

It seems to happen all the time in casual conversations. Someone says, “I just can’t believe how fast the month is flying by!” I don’t know about you, but I hear this all the time. In fact, I think that very statement could be one of the anthems of my life. Time just always seems to be flying by. Things that were months or weeks out on the calendar are now just around the corner. Once one thing is off the radar, something else comes up to take its place.

Here are I am thinking about how the month of April has just flown by. Easter always takes up a huge chunk of time and energy. Add a church ladies retreat, a family ladies retreat, my sister moving home, planning a sermon for mother’s day, a local area connection dinner for women in ministry, a party for a friend, randomly getting a new king mattress (hand me down, but in great condition) and then needing to spend the day shopping to find all the bedding for it since we’ve never owned a king bed, preparing all the permissions slips for summer which means nailing down all the details for our summer activities, multiple lunch dates with friends, family and mentors, selling two vehicles… should I go on? I could list all things that I didn’t get to this month, that I now feel guilty about  – like not reading enough, not writing enough, not meeting with students enough… No wonder the days fly by! Really??? Anybody else just plain tired after reading all that? I know I am after living it!

Right now I find myself in a situation I find myself in a lot… It’s the day before something, today is the day before my family takes off for a ladies retreat at the Oregon Coast. I’ve been planning and prepping for this weekend away for months. Two weeks ago I was busy preparing the devotional times I hope to share with the ladies, on Tuesday I was printing all my materials and making a pile of all the stuff I need to be remember to bring. Somehow in all the prep and trying to keep up with life that I almost feel too tired to go… This bothers me. My life gets so busy that instead of looking at a weekend away as a blessing, I tend to view it just as another thing I need to do. I should clarify that this has nothing against the event itself or the people who will be attending it with me. It’s good stuff, but more than anything I just want to sit in my pajamas and do nothing. Instead of being social, I want to hide. I’m being real here!

This month was a tricky one for me. I really tried to balance things out, but I don’t feel like succeed. I don’t want my life to just fly by. I don’t want my time to be spent just marking dates off the calendar and throwing myself headlong into the next thing. I know I’ve mentioned it before, but with my schedule, I feel like I live my life a month in advance at times, by the time I actually get to whatever is on the calendar I’m either too tired to enjoy it or my mind is already onto the next month and all things that I need to be doing in prep for that. It’s a vicious cycle!

As I prepare to head into the next big thing on calendar, I pray that God would give me rest. Even in a room full of people, I pray that my little introverted spirit would be refreshed and feel a sense of peace and calm. I don’t want to live life frantically. I don’t want to be so busy that even the good things in my life start to look like things to check of my list. I want to savor the moments! I want to really live in them – not too tired to enjoy them and not thinking about the next big thing I need to be on top of.

I can see how this all comes back to my core value word that I got to add back (it’s really my aspiration word) – balance! I need to find balance. I know that I struggled with this month so much because my core value of balance is out of whack. Even though April has flown by, here is hoping that I can slow it for May. I guess that is the great thing about each new month and really even each new day, we can decide the pace. I’ve been trying to keep up a little too much in April. I know myself and I know I can’t live this pace continually. It’s up to me now to set the tone for May. Here’s hoping it doesn’t fly by as quickly.

 

Not in Kansas anymore! April 25, 2012

Filed under: Family Time — Amy Scott @ 3:46 pm

Toby and Todd playing in the yard!

This Sunday my sister moved home from Kansas! As one of my closest friends, it was difficult to have her at such a great distance. I’m thankful for technology that allowed us to stay close while she was gone, but having her here in person is so much better. It’s been a fun couple of days as I have gotten to see her each day and make up for lost time! Here are some highlights from the past few days:

  • Our puppies got to meet for the first time! It was fun to meet April’s Todd and see him interact with my Toby. Todd is full of spunk and really loves to kiss me. It was a very exciting meeting on Sunday!
  • April agreed to be my travel buddy for my last drive in the Malibu. Monday evening we drove up to Puyallup so I could sell my Malibu to my cousin. It seemed fitting to spend the last drive with her talking about life and what we see our futures. (For those at are wondering, I feel really good about selling the Malibu and keeping it in the family. I think I worked through all my emotions on Thursday when I thought it would sell and didn’t).
  • We’ve been sharing with each other our new favorite songs and bands. We’ve also spent a good deal of time singing along to old favorites.
  • April brought me beautiful tulips that are now displayed on my table! She’s so sweet!

  • The only 2 people in the theater!

    We went to the movies and were the only two people in the theater! It was fun to talk during the movie and even text and know that I wasn’t going to get in trouble!

  • We laughed while shopping for random things and at dinner together in our favorite Mexican restaurant. It was good to have her back because we laugh so much when we’re together. There is a true goofiness that comes out when I’m with her.
  • We’ve already had a sleepover! She kept me company while my hubby was away at a conference.
  • This morning we both read for a while. April kept reading while I did quiet things around the house. It was so restful to just be ourselves. We enjoy each other’s company even when we’re not talking.

April hasn’t lived this close to me since she got married almost 4 years ago. I’m excited to see our friendship continue to grow. I’m praying for her and Andrew as they settle in to being back in the northwest. This is an exciting time as a family and I’m really happy to have them back!