Owen is officially 5 months old today. It’s strange to think that in just another month he will already be half a year old. I always felt like time was racing by me and the addition of Owen to my life only seems to add to that feeling. Every time I blink I feel like he is bigger. There are some mornings where I pick him up out of his bed and ask him if he grew in the night.
Owen has been exploring the world of solids food over the last month. He has tasted squash, carrots, sweet potatoes, prunes, rice cereal, peas, green beans and applesauce. I think that carrots and sweet potatoes are winning in the favorite category. I now have the joy of cleaning baby food off of bibs and outfits. Rice cereal makes everything so crusty! Owen is getting baths almost daily thanks to solid foods.
The whole purpose behind starting solid foods was so that Owen would have something to eat while I was away at work. Bottles are long gone in our house. Owen will have nothing to do with them. Solids have given my mom an option while she watches him, but sadly, this hasn’t solved our “Owen needs Mommy” situation. It seems that Owen can handle about 3 hours away from me before his mood takes a drop into unhappiness. I would be lying if I said the situation didn’t frustrate me. After some consideration, Jeremy and I have decided to change my work schedule. Instead of working in the mornings, I am going to try afternoons and see if that makes a difference. Right now, Owen wakes up and I feed him and leave all in about 20 minutes of time. Our hope is that by having more mom time in the mornings, he’ll be better with being left in the afternoons. I have no clue if this will work, but I am willing to try tweaking things to find something that works better for Owen.
I never expected to have a mama’s boy. I assumed that by having a son I would be the odd one out while Jeremy and Owen shared some special manly bond. Maybe that is still yet to come. While I love Owen dearly, the constant attachment has been draining and flustering. I’ve been told by a few close friends and family members that I am a perfectionist and that I have unrealistic expectations on myself right now. I had my life organized in such a way that I knew what I wanted each day to look like and what the timeline should be. Owen has his own agenda and it doesn’t always match up with mine. I’m definitely being stretched right now. My prayer is that God uses this difficult time to grow my character and make me a better person than I was before. I don’t want to waste this season. I want to grow in it.
When people ask me if Owen is a good baby, I want to say yes, of course, because I honestly think he is the best baby ever. But just saying yes to that statement doesn’t feel like the whole story. There is a whole lot more to Owen than just being good. I was rereading Bread & Wine by Shauna Niequist a few weeks ago and I came across this great quote about her children – “…They are very real, very normal children, not angels or devils, just children – difficult and sweet and exhausting and wonderful in the same moment, all the time.” That sums up Owen! He isn’t an angel or a devil. He is just a baby boy figuring out this crazy world he lives in. He is difficult and sweet and exhausting and wonderful. This quote took the pressure off me to have a good baby because in mind that means a perfect baby and Owen is not perfect. None of us are.
Here are few more random things about Owen before closing this blog. Owen is snugly fitting into 6 month clothing. I might have waited a little long to transition from 3 months to 6 months. I already have 3 boxes of baby clothes packed up in his closet. These boxes are another indicator that Owen is growing and changing quickly. Owen loves playing with his toys and grabbing his feet. His thumb/fist is often in his mouth. Teeth have yet to make an appearance, but my guess is they will soon. Owen still loves bath time and he is a great splasher. Each month with Owen brings new memories and exciting experiences. It’s been such a joy to watch this little guy grow and daily discover things about himself and his world. Life with Owen is certainly an adventure.