I’ve never been much of an adventurer. That daring, bold spirit has never resided in me. I’m cautious and calculated. I like to know what I’m getting into and I want guarantees that things are going to work out. Since Owen has entered my life I’ve gotten in touch with my adventurous side. I honestly thought that once Jeremy went back to work I would sit at home with the baby all day long. I was scared. Doing things alone meant all eyes were on me if something wasn’t going right. It was a lot of pressure. But I’m learning that getting out and about isn’t as hard as I thought it was going to be. Yes, it takes extra time, but it’s totally doable.
On Monday, Owen and I drove up to Tukwila to have to lunch with my friend, Maggie. He was a trouper for the hour and a half car ride up. He survived 3 diapers and feedings in the car. The second of those diaper changes involved a poopy diaper that went up this back and got all over his clothes and the changing pad. It was glorious. It’s always a little nerve wracking taking Owen into a restaurant, especially without Jeremy, but Owen went to sleep pretty quickly and I was grateful. After our meal, Owen, Maggie and I walked around the mall together. It was fun because this was my first time being in a mall for the holidays. I love all the decorations and the hub bub of the Christmas season. As I was getting ready to pack up, Maggie pointed out that the stroller wasn’t folding up well because the diaper bag was still in it! Oops! Gotta love having an audience for moments like those.
Last night was my first night returning to teaching my Wednesday night class. I had planned to keep Owen with me so all the girls could see him. Once they had a preview and a lot of gushing, I decided to drop Owen off at the nursery for the first time. It did a feel a little weird having someone watch him when I was so close by, but lucky for me, my class kept me pretty distracted. I was able focus in on them. I had the urge to check on Owen occasionally, but I knew he was okay. I had a pager that they would use if he really needed me, so I pushed the urge to check on him away. It was so sweet to pick him up after church. It was good to have a little time away from him and to do something that I love, but I was glad to have him back with me once it was all over. Getting out of church was a little harder because the Wednesday night crowd hadn’t seen him yet. Jeremy is a proud dad and took Owen around to show him off while I got gas in my car. First time in the nursery was something I was a little nervous about so I’m glad that it went well and that milestone is now behind us.
Today I loaded up the car and drove down to Longview to hang out with my sister-in-law and nephew. I took the stroller into Target so that way I wouldn’t have a cart and therefore wouldn’t buy anything. That idea failed me and I ended up buying raccoon pajamas for Owen. They were just too cute to pass up. I knew I shouldn’t have gone into the baby aisle. Jeremy loves raccoons and these jammies have the zipper front that Jeremy likes for diaper changes. It seemed like fate. The morning was well spent walking and talking. Time with other moms is fun because they understand where I am and I got to see my super cute nephew. It was a definite win for me!
As I was wandering around the stores and traveling this morning, I realized that I’m not as intimidated as I once was about being out with Owen. I’m starting to get my groove and mommyhood is clicking a bit more. I find the more I’m out and about the more human I feel. Yes, it can be tiring to be on the go, but I’m learning that it’s tiring to both me and Owen. The more out of the house we are, the better Owen sleeps at night. All the stimulation really gets to him. We’ve been having great nights of 5+ hours of sleep on a regular basis. Last night after the evening at church, Owen slept 7.5 hours. Going out with him has it’s pay offs that is for sure!
So, I have decided that I am an adventurer. Instead of looking at these experiences with fear and worry, I have decided to view them as adventures. An adventure is a win when I get out and do it. It doesn’t matter if Owen is fussy or if he makes noise in a store. The true success is just getting out doing stuff. I will not let fear keep me inside and away from life. Now I’m not saying that home days are bad. They are great. I love home. I’m just learning that I’m not scared to get out. I’m grateful for these opportunities. I am growing and stretching. I can see changes in myself through these opportunities and I am embracing my inner adventurer!