As a girl it’s my right to change my mind… Isn’t that how the saying goes? Today I reached 4,000 gifts and I had planned to stop counting for a while and it a break. Sometimes you need space, even from good things. The first 1,000 I counted to I did in about 2 months. Each time it has taken me a bit longer. This time it took me 3 months. I thought that if I couldn’t keep up with the project, why do it?
But… I changed my mind. As I was writing my 4,000th gift I felt sad because I still had more gifts to write down. I wasn’t done for the day and really I wasn’t done with this challenged. So I flipped the page and started 1,000 Gifts Take 5. I’m again on my way – this time 5,000 is the goal. Surprisingly, I only have about a quarter of my journal left and I’m thinking it’s actually possible to fill it completely. I’m not sure I believe it was going happen, but now I think it just might.
Like all good projects there are guidelines and stipulations. Each time they get more relaxed. This time I’m not putting pressure on myself for time. It’s not a competition. I learned from this last season that when I need to count gifts my journal is there and waiting for me. On some of my darkest days it was gift counting that pulled me out of myself and gave me hope and a feeling of life. It seems like when things are going good it would be the best time to count, but I have learned its the opposite. When things are hard, I need to count. When I’m having a bad day, I need to count. When life makes no sense, I need to count.
I’m sure you might be tired of how one book and one challenge has impacted me so much. I just can’t help but share. It’s been too good to keep quiet. I just wanted you to know that I thought I was done for a while, but maybe I’m addicted to gift counting. It doesn’t seem I can give it up. I changed my mind and I’m still counting.